ampersand

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Archive for April, 2008

25 April
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I should've known something was up.

There’s been a lot of out of the ordinary action in the subway yard that my apartment overlooks. It should’ve raised my city-dwelling spidey sense. The TTC has gone on strike. This is twice in the two years that I’ve lived in this apartment. The first time was a wildcat strike. I’m not sure what to call this one. Everyone said a strike was averted over the weekend, but then they failed to ratify the new contract, and as of midnight, the douchebags went on strike.

You know, I’d have much less of an issue with this if I didn’t have kind of important plans tomorrow. Or if they’d given us the 48-hour notice they fucking promised.

BLERGH.

25 April
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Girliest year ever.

Continuing the trend, I’m now in love with Kiehl’s. Damn you, 40% off sale!

25 April
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Ball of Confusion, part 1

Things that have confused me this week:

The actions of most infuriating man on the planet.

Client revisions at work (that’s a constant, though).

My constant level of exhaustion.

Why I can’t seem to get a decent night’s sleep ever. I’ve become a tortured soul, and it’s not a good look for me.

Why they decided to go so over the top with the Canadian accents on How I Met Your Mother this week — they used to have the way we say “out” down COLD. And now the Canadians sound like someone doing a bad Irish accent while drunk. C’mon guys. Get it together.

17 April
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Damn you, Jim Halpert!

I’m all verklempt. Talk amongst yourselves.

No, seriously. Watching “The Office” tonight made me cry like I’ve haven’t cried in a really long time.

Clearly, SOMEBODY is a little too invested in Jim & Pam’s relationship.

Also, yay Kevin for winning the parking spots back!

12 April
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Thoughts while watching SNL

I’m not a fan of men who wear scarves as an accessory. Thank you, Ashton Kutcher for perpetuating another misguided fashion trend.

There are lots of cute boys on SNL these days. Maybe they’re not traditional hotties, but then again, that’s never been my bag. Plus, they’re goofy and funny and smart on top of all the cute.

I heart Amy Poehler. And all the other ladies on the show right now rock pretty hard themselves.

Oh, Studio 8H, how I long to visit thee.

And there’s always someone who says the show sucks, or isn’t what it used to be, or any of the same criticisms people have been using since 1976, it’s time to shut the hell up. Have you SEEN some of those early sketches? The show was never perfect from start to finish. There will always be bad sketches and jokes that go on too long and weak-link performers. Like, come on people. Can you imagine how much sheer creative force (not to mention hard work) has to go into NINETY MINUTES of air time?

Why is SNL derided so badly when in baseball, an average of .300 is amazing? If, in sport, you can get a hit THREE times out of ten and be hall of fame material, why do people expect seasons upon seasons of comedic perfection?

12 April
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Topcoat, Topcoat, my kingdom for good topcoat!

2008 has been a year where I’ve found myself becoming more and more girly. For example, here are some things I’ve recently had on my non-work to do list:

Buy Diorshow mascara. Use coupon at the Bay to get a free lipgloss. Eventually get sucked into gift with purchase scam that causes me to buy even MORE Dior cosmetics that I can’t actually afford, but now completely love.

Find a purplish nail polish.

Find a top coat that allows me to go more than 24 hours before my nails chip. Or one that doesn’t somehow activate my nail polish and slowly turn the top coat into a translucent version of my nail polish.

Get a working curling iron and/or hot rollers. Subsequently, learn how to use.

Buy cute clothes.

Find cute shoes that don’t hurt and allow me to walk to the subway without wanting to chop off my feet.

Find the perfect red lipstick. One that doesn’t wear me.

Perfect beachy, wavy hair.

All of the above have made me wonder if I’m going through some kind of delayed adolescence. I think I sort of am. Is 27 the new 15?

12 April
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There's something about a man in a peacoat.

I don’t know what it is, but it’s kinda hot. I don’t dig a man in uniform, but a dude in a peacoat? I’m all over that.

Also, I feel another migraine coming on. Oy.

02 April
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what if it all means something?

Where I come from (and by that, I mean writer land), if you mention something in a story, if you write about something happening in a film or a play, it has significance. Because the time you’re allotted is so short, EVERYTHING has to mean something. I mean, Chekhov himself said “If in Act I you have a pistol hanging on the wall, then it must fire in the last act”. Otherwise, what’s the freaking point?

When you’ve spent years of your life making, quite frankly, mountains out of molehills, it’s no wonder writers are so monumentally fucked up. But you know what? EVERYTHING has a story. There’s subtext behind every single freaking thing in that happens. It might seem random, but there’s always motivation of some kind, and I can’t stop analyzing and trying to find out if a cigar is, in fact, a cigar in any given situation.

I can’t stop this fascination with subtext, with finding out other people’s stories, other people’s issues, other people’s business. Call it nosy if you will, but I really think it’s got to do with having a better understanding of the world around us. Maybe we’d be a more sympathetic world. Probably not. I’ll take off those rose colored glasses now.

There is a problem with this whole obsession with what’s happening underneath the surface. I start to think that everyone reads as much into things as I do. Which, come on, is almost completely impossible. But, thinking that everyone reads as much into things as I do has paralyzed me in the past. Because if someone else figures out the subtext I have placed behind that seemingly innocent token or thoughtful act, they’ll know I’m madly in like with the most infuriating man on the planet, rather than just being infuriated by how mysterious he thinks he is.

But there’s the rub. Nobody else (at least, that I know of) is inside my head, unless J. Edgar Hoover has been tasked with wiretapping the thoughts of the universe from the great beyond. So nobody else (except for a select few friends whom I let into a small receiving area of the giant ball of neuroses and spastic synapses that is my brain) knows that the reason I want to buy someone a jar of olives is because even before The Olive Theory made it to national television, I had the same idea. And to meet someone who wants to eat my olives (no, that’s not a euphemism) instantly means more to me than the kind courtesy of relieving me and my greek salad of kalamata-osity. Or, you know, an anecdote that didn’t happen.

Then again, part of it is that I’m a thoughtful person, I guess. I dig nothing more than remembering something small a person said and then doing something that recalls that day, that moment, that whatever. Could that be my love for the good old comedic callback?

I’m not even sure this post has a point anymore.  Bottom line: I feel too much, and I think even more. Even if nobody who looks at me has any idea that any of this is going on underneath the surface. I’m such an iceberg, it’s not even funny.

01 April
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stupid hormones.

I’m sitting here, bawling in front of the live-action version of “Charlotte’s Web”. That Wilbur continues to be Some Pig, even 56 years after he was created.

I think I need to buy this book. It’s been too long since I read it.

Now where is my Kleenex?